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IRS Audit

November 5, 2010

At the end of the tax year, the IRS office sent an inspector to audit the books of a local hospital. While the IRS agent was checking the books he turned to the CFO of the hospital and said, “I notice you buy a lot of bandages. What do you do with the end of the roll when there’s too little left to be of any use?

” Good question ,” noted the CFO. “We save them up and send them back to the bandage company and every now and then they send us a free box of bandages.

“Oh,” replied the auditor, somewhat disappointed that his unusual question had a practical answer. But on he went, in his obnoxious way. “What about all these plaster purchases? What do you do with what’s left over after setting a cast on a patient?

“Ah, yes,” replied the CFO, realizing that the inspector was trying to trap him with an unanswerable question . “We save it and send it back to the manufacturer, and every now and then they send us a free package of plaster.

“I see,” replied the auditor, thinking hard about how he could fluster the know-it-all CFO. “Well,” he went on, “What do you do with all the leftover foreskins from the circumcisions you perform?

“Here, too, we do not waste,” answered the CFO. “What we do is save all the little foreskins and send them to the IRS Office, and about once a year they send us a complete dick.”

6 Comments leave one →
  1. November 5, 2010 7:15 PM

    Have you been audited, Gary?

    • November 5, 2010 11:16 PM

      LOL…..Nope! Broke people rarely get audited!

  2. November 5, 2010 12:36 PM


  3. LVISS permalink
    November 7, 2010 12:11 AM

    There will be more foreskins than the other two with a long waiting list of applicants for replacements. Hickery Dickery Dock.
    Generally auditors like want to grill with some inconvenient questions. But when you tell them everything yourselves they get disappointed becoz they would like to find it themselves and put it in their report.

  4. November 11, 2010 9:48 PM

    Ha ha ha ha oooooooooo!

  5. August 28, 2013 11:02 AM

    Love your joke, Gary–and BTW, I got audited as a young woman in the 20s, despite being stony broke. May I use the graphic of the many with the magnifying glass for a post I;m writing o on my (totally noncommercial) blog? With proper credit to you and your blog, of course. Many thanks, Josna

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