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Mayor of the Pond People

September 23, 2009


Written Monday, August 17, 2009


The residents of snob hill are lucky enough to have their very own mayor. Mayor Gordon is the snob of all snobs atop snob hill and even has a “right hand man” or vice mayor if you will. I suppose the vice mayor would take over for Mayor Gordon in an absence or in case of a sudden death? It’s unclear to us pond people as to how Mayor Gordon actually became the mayor of snob hill. Was this a self proclamation that everyone on snob hill just went along with? Was there an actual democratic election on snob hill and Mayor Gordon was the victor and was allowed to choose his vice mayor? Maybe he really isn’t the mayor at all and was just given this title as a nickname by us pond people? I suppose the world will never really know.

I could tell you most all the reasons that Mayor Gordon is called the mayor but this post would end up being too long so I will give just a few examples. Every three weeks, ALL members MUST move their RV from whatever site they are occupying and move it at least ten sites away. This is to ensure that every member gets a fair opportunity at all the sites available at the resort. Mayor Gordon, the vice mayor and a couple of other “select” snobs that are friends with Mayor Gordon seem to be immune from this rule. We pond people call that special treatment so the resort employees must acknowledge his mayor title. If we don’t move our RV’s, we hear about it and are requested to move. If a pond person asks why some people are immune from this rule, you always get a different bullshit answer different from the last every time.

Mayor Gordon has a lot of clout not only with snob hillers but also with the resort itself. If Mayor Gordon doesn’t like you, you will know it. Mayor Gordon will bitch about your every move to the resort employees until you either don’t want to camp there anymore or they ask you to leave and not return. If he doesn’t like your golf cart for whatever reason, you will inevitably be asked to take it off the resort property. I have seen it with my very own eyes. I could seriously go on another ten pages but will spare you the reading.

Last night some of us pond people gathered at Billy’s camper next door to me to sit around the campfire and chit chat. I was tired last night and went to bed early for a change. The next morning I woke up, made some coffee and headed back to Billy’s as I do every morning. Billy and Tommy were having some coffee and chit chatting when I arrived. When they saw me, they started grinning from ear to ear and Billy spoke up and said “morning mayor”. Tommy piped in and said “yeah, morning mayor”. “Mayor” I said. “What the hell are you guys talking about” I asked. “We took a little vote last night after you went to bed and because of your little stunt this weekend,we elected you mayor of the pond people” Billy informed me. “We liked the way you got us all together with the greatest of ease, you obviously have a lot of clout with us pond people and we need a mayor like they have on snob hill” Billy stated. “Who better to represent us than you” Billy asked. I started shaking my head and laughing out loud while taking a seat in my favorite camp chair. “You guys crack me up” I said. After I stopped laughing, I reluctantly accepted the position. Billy and Tommy let all of the pond people know that they now have an official mayor. Nobody seemed to mind me being mayor as far as I know anyway. I appointed Billy as my vice mayor in case I need to be absent or in the case of my (god forbid) sudden death.

I must admit, it feels pretty cool to have people wave and call me mayor when I’m walking my dogs or at the pool. I think Paula secretly likes to be called “Mrs. Mayor” as well. Word of the pond people having a mayor has already reached snob hill and Mayor Gordon has gone out of his way to chit chat with me. Who knows, maybe Mayor Gordon and I can take a nice long golf cart ride sometime and work out some of our issues?

The pond people have spoken!

28 Comments leave one →
  1. September 23, 2009 7:17 AM

    So this is what I’ve been missing all these years of not camping out. heeeee! Congrats on your nomination, use your ‘power’ for the good of all mankind. lol.

    • September 23, 2009 4:40 PM

      See, you need to go camping more often Renee? Maybe you could become queen of the campground or something, who knows?

      Thank you and I am FOR the people BY the people! 😉

  2. Tosha permalink
    September 23, 2009 7:27 AM

    haha.. LOL.. This is why you are loved among all of us.. You are funny as hell.. And I’m gonna start calling you Mayor.. It fits..

    I guess there is a “seriouslyneedstogetlaid Mayor Gordon” in every bunch. There’s one up on plum ridge and you just want to slap him and knock his “im better than you even though no one likes me” smirk off his face. But.. Hub’s aunt who lives there several months out of the year wont let me do that. No.. instead she plans lil bouts of revenge here and there.. Just to bug him. Its hilarious the small shit that will bug this man. Like moving the rocks at the edge of his yard. Writing on the road infront of his drive way. uh huh.. Lil stupid petty shit.

    Making you move your camper every 3 weeks. Would seriously put a bug up my ass.. Even more so when Mayor Seriouslyneedstogetlaid and his posse didn’t have to.. It would be grounds for possibly burning their shit down. I know violence is never the answer but sometimes random acts of violence give the authorities something to do.. Plus.. It can be fun to burn shit down.. Not that I would know or anything..

    • September 23, 2009 4:56 PM

      Why thank you Tosha! Call me mayor all you want, lord knows I have been called MUCH worse. LOL The stupid little petty shit is fun if you ask me. I get a kick out of people like that.

      It does suck having to move every 3 weeks but I understand why they do it. Not that I would know either, but burning shit down is kinda fun huh? LOL

      • Tosha permalink
        September 23, 2009 5:36 PM

        yep.. I hear its a great form of stress relief..

        • September 23, 2009 5:40 PM

          Yeah, so is….. we won’t go there. 😀

  3. September 23, 2009 8:07 AM

    Well good morning Mr Mayor!!! You crack me the hell up.

  4. September 23, 2009 8:30 AM

    Just leave it to you Gary! You rule! 🙂

  5. September 23, 2009 9:35 AM

    This is just too freakin funny! Now all you guys need is a Pond People Mascot and Flag. Next summer you can crown one of the girls Miss Pond People Queen of Summer 2010!

    • September 23, 2009 4:59 PM

      A flag has been brought up by a fellow pond person. Maybe next year, who knows? “Miss Pond People Queen of Summer 2010” is a GREAT idea! I will bring that up at the next PP (pond people) meeting. LOL

  6. September 23, 2009 11:38 AM

    Haha! Look what your friends brewed up while you slept. Congratulations, Mr. and Mrs. Mayor!

    • September 23, 2009 5:00 PM

      You just never know what those guys are going to come up with next. It’s HONESTLY hard for me to go to sleep while they are still up. I’m scared they are going to knock my camper over or something with me in it. LOL Thanks Jean! It’s a great honor to represent the pond people!!

  7. September 23, 2009 11:55 AM

    Congratulations Mr. Mayor! This is a great development. Can’t wait to read about all your mayoral exploits.

  8. September 23, 2009 6:20 PM

    LOL why am I now humming that mayor of the munchkin city song! 🙂

    yah! Can’t wait to go camping with you mayor!

    • September 23, 2009 6:29 PM

      I will be there the first two weeks in October. 😀

  9. Tosha permalink
    September 23, 2009 8:34 PM

    Maybe… your next ink.. should say Mayor of the pond people…

    • September 23, 2009 9:05 PM

      Hey yeah! That would look GREAT across my back. NOT! LOL

  10. September 23, 2009 10:22 PM

    Oh, crap, now you’re just gonna go and get all mayoral on us, aren’t ya?? HAHAHAHA

    Do you get to do cool mayor stuff like presenting honored guests with the Key to the Pond? and do you get to cut ribbons when they open up new campsites ’round the pond? Hoo-EEE! The responsibilty is overwhelming!!

    Congratulations, Mr. Mayor!

    • September 24, 2009 4:11 PM

      LOL….I haven’t really done anything as the newly elected mayor yet. Key to the pond sounds like a good idea, I may have to look into that one. The responsibilties are ENDLESS! LOL

      Thanks Trisha!

  11. September 24, 2009 7:43 AM

    ROFFLMAO trisha!!! The next parade he’ll be the grand marshall all decked out and his cart will need to have a sign on it! Oh the fun is endless here!
    How bout a golden fish hook? I think that’s fitting!

    • September 24, 2009 4:15 PM

      Now did you just look inside my mind and see a near future blog post?

      Golden fish hook. HA! You kill me JJ!

  12. September 24, 2009 7:44 AM

    work on that mayor wave thing Gary!

    • September 24, 2009 4:17 PM

      Ohhhhhh, I got that DOWN! I also am getting pretty good at the cheesy smile too!

  13. September 26, 2009 2:11 AM

    Hello Mr. Mayor may I be humble enough to add my congratulations to your Highness. I have no doubt that you will uphold your Mayoral duties & continue to stick it up the snob hillers.

    • September 26, 2009 2:05 PM

      Why of course you can dear pesant and thank you! I VOW to keep stickin’ it to the snobs on snob hill, rest assured. 😀

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